We have a panicdemic

While the World Health Organization has gone to threat level tapioca, the new strain of H1N1 Swine flu virus has killed ... one in America. A total of 45 cases have been confirmed in 9 countries and there have been a grand total of two confirmed deaths but 159 suspected deaths in Mexico. But that could change, especially in the U.S. where the recession cost the jobs and resources of the public health workers that would be necessary to fight the spread of the disease. The good news is that patient zero has been found in his Mexican mountain home. The bad news is that only one plant in America makes the appropriate vaccine which would require at least four to six months before it could be released to the public. Thanks to jet travel the virus could be spread far and wide. While there is no word on its effects on the drug wars, Mexican daily affairs seem to have ground to a halt. And while German officials are trying to keep their country calm, the rest of the world is trembling in fear of the rise of their new zombie overlords.

On the brain

The brain has been on the brain of researchers of late. Researchers unveiled a detailed brain simulation called Blue Brain at the European Future Technologies meeting in Prague. But researchers are doing more than simply creating ever more exacting models of the brain. They are getting it to send tweets. Wearing a cap fitted with electrodes, Adam Wilson, a graduate student at University of Wisconsin-Madison was able to Twitter without anything more than brain impulses. Another use for brainwave projection is being consider: military robot wrangling. A brainwave headset that allows a person to push a ping-pong ball through concentration may have other applications. Apparently pushing that ping-pong ball only requires concentration. What one concentrates on is quite immaterial. That's where a new project by the Department of Homeland Security's Science and Technology Directorate comes in. "Brain music" is the new performance enhancing drug. Firefighters will be given the "instrumental alert track" that will provide focus and energy or reduce stress. Given all the attention the brain is getting, maybe science is simply fattening us up for the inevitable zombie invasion.

Maybe it was delivered on a polo pony

While it may be the case that "neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night, nor the winds of change, nor a nation challenged, will stay us from the swift completion of our appointed rounds" if the mail is late, it may be very late. A postcard mailed from Montana finally got delivered 47 years after it was hand cancelled on July 5, 1962. No one in the Postal Service is exactly taking responsibility for what happened, much less willing to speculate over why it happened. While emails sometimes get bogged down in that series of tubes that runs around the world and even to Mars, it still remains faster than snail mail.

World leaders gone wild

It's been a busy few days as world leaders have been behaving badly. Everybody's favorite fun-time wacked-out Persian, Iranian President President Mahmoud 'I want to be Darius' Ahmadinejad experienced a 30 country walk-out during a speech at the United Nations anti-racism conference in Geneva.  The speech was called 'hate speech' by the French. Apparently the French were oblivious to the stones they were throwing from their own glass house in the wake of their own badly behaving leader, France's "bitchy little princess," President Nicolas Sarkozy. Sarko apparently had quite a few words (few of them kind) for his fellow leaders. However, it seems that no deed of a bad leader goes unrewarded. During the recent Summit of the Americas, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez gave President Obama a copy of "Open Veins of Latin America: Five Centuries of the Pillage of a Continent." Shortly thereafter, the book became a bestseller on Amazon.com.

Memos from the president

Demonstrating that what is immoral isn't necessarily illegal, the people at GITMO and Langley will get off the hook for waterboarding and other acts of enhanced interrogation. Apparently they require "confidence" to continue doing their jobs. However, Team Obama is releasing releasing four secret memos from the Bush administration on the matter. Three of those memos were written by the Justice Department's Office of Legal Counsel (OLC), Stephen G. Bradbury. The Fourth was the product of the razzle-dazzle dynamic duo OLC lawyer John Yoo and Jay Bybee. The CIA argued for redacting the memos under the "if you publish, they will learn and undercut our methods" argument, while the ACLU, which had pushed for publication, made "the public deserves full disclosure" argument. Congresscritters are already sounding off on the documents, with Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman  Patrick J. Leahy calling them "chilling." And while Obama isn't necessarily wrong when he says "This is a time for reflection, not retribution," seeking a little bit of justice would seem to be just as a laudible a goal.

Race to the Sansad Bhavan

The first round of elections promises to be interesting as at total of 700 million Indians are expected to go to the polls and vote with 124 seats up for grabs in the Lok Sabha, India's lower house of parliament. Neither the BJP nor the Congress party are expected to gain a majority, but Rahul Gandhi, heir apparent of the Congress party, is certainly giving it the college try. While as many myths seem to surround the Indian elections, it does seem that the newest generation thinks voting is 'cool.'  Indeed, this election has voters under the age of 25, around 200 million saying 'yes we can.' Of course, what difference they make remains to be seen.

The French disconnection

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Despite being characterized as cheeze-eating surrender monkeys with a love for tiny clove cigarettes and women with hairy armpits, the French are actually taking an active role in pirate suppression off the coast of Africa. French navy officials announced they captured 11 suspected pirates off the coast of Kenya. Even before the U.S. Navy freed Richard Phillips and killed three Somali pirates, the French were taking a more aggressive stance, having recently stormed a vessel, killing a pirate. This time they captured a 30-foot long "mother ship" loaded up with a potentially explosive combination of weapons and fuel. But according to Somalia's Minister for International Co-operation, Abdlrahman Warsame, the real problem of piracy can only be solved on land. As long as the situation in Somalia remains chaotic, piracy will remain. The French approach may yet be a problem rather than a solution.

Another long night in Bangkok

One protest is very like another when the army's called out to protect the government brother. It's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity, to be spending the new year under a state of emergency. In Thailand, the yellow shirts, the party of the middle class, business owners, the military and representatives of the royal family, laid siege to the country's airports last year. This time, the opposition red shirts, the nation's party of the poor, has been rioting in the streets. Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva declared a state of emergency and the country's top military officer has vowed to "end the chaos" currently engulfing the nation and spoiling the Buddhist new year celebration. And the self-imposed exile and former Thai leader Thaksin Shinawatra, whose many moves do not exactly number among the purest, is fanning the flames by saying the time might be right for a revolution. Whatever happens next, Thailand might be better served by having its government turned over to Browncoats.

Cutthroat Somalia

A Somali pirate named Farah declared that 'America is our new enemy' after three of his compatriots were shot dead by U.S. Navy SEALs over the weekend, ending a standoff between pirates and the Navy. Another Somali pirate, Ali Nur, declared that they will kill French and American sailors if they end up among their future hostages. Seemingly following up on that, the plane carrying U.S. Congressman Donald Payne (D-N.J.) was fired upon as he left the country on his latest trip there. Apparently that attack involved a total of six mortar rounds but no one was hurt. The crew of the Maersk Alabama took the opportunity to celebrate the end of the five-day standoff and the return of their captain, Richard Phillips. They also called upon President Barack Obama "to use all of his resources and increase the commitment to ending this Somali pirate scourge." But the real problem is the lack of coordination over the pirate problem. Without an achievable battle plan and a larger effort to combat the root of the piracy problem, the international community runs the risk of a Moghidishu at sea.

Under Siege: Curse of the Somali Pirates

The pirates of Somalia are at it again, but this time, like a Hollywood action flick, the crew fought to regain control of the vessel. Pirates hijacked the Maersk Alabama but ultimately were left with only the ship's captain to bargain with. The vessel was transporting humanitarian aid supplies to Mombasa, Kenya, when it was attacked. The U.S.S. Bainbridge was on its way to the scene but was not expected to arrive until Thursday. In the meantime, the Maersk Alabama remains disabled near the pirate haven of Eyl, Somalia. It is the sixth vessel in a week to be jacked by pirates in the area. One can only hope that this newest pirate drama will have a happy ending.

You say want a Twitter Revolution

Sandwiched between Romania to the west and Ukraine to the east is the poorest nation in eastern Europe, the wine-producing country that is Moldova. Demonstrators used Twitter to organize in the wake of the announcement of election results showing that the Communists were returned to power. In what has been described as a spontaneous uprising in the capital, Chisinau, included the storming of the parliament and president's offices. While a host of historical issues are at play in this recent upheavel, the gaps appear to be both generational and regional. The protests were led by youthful demonstrators. But while the capital's population leans to the EU, Romania and the West, the rest of the nation remains pro-Russian. In the wake of the sack of the parliament building, President Vladimir Voronin is running the Romanian ambassador out of town, blaming his government for recent events. With Moldova going through its painful transition from communist caterpillar to EU butterfly, it's going to take a lot of wine to wash this spasm down.

Stability.Growth.Jobs.

A joke about France and it's three values all revolved on the use of punctuation between them and went something like this:

"Liberty, Equality, Fraternity. Liberty (none!) Equality (none!) Fraternity (none).

One thinks of this joke looking at the G20 leaders standing together in front of the words "Stability, Growth, Jobs" in big, just off-white letters at the London conference. Everybody was lining up to lay claim to the success of the outing. They hammered out a six-point plan that will introduce more than $1 trillion into the world economy. The issues addressed included a boost for the IMF, an agreement over tax havens, a global trade agreement, fiscal stimulus on an individual nation basis, free trade, financial regulation and a crack down on bankers (although the idea of a global regulatory authority was a nonstarter for the Obama administration). But, as German Chancellor Angela Merkel pointed out, what matters is how the regulations she got passed work out in the real world. So we'll have to wait and see if the result is Stability (none!) Growth (none!) Jobs (none).

London calling

The G20 rolled into London and boy were they just getting started. It seems there are two approaches to the current crisis: more regulation vs more spending. In the regulation corner are the French and Germans. In the spending corner are the Brits and Americans. While French president has threatened to throw a hissy fit if an agreement isn't reached, everyone may actually be close to one, in which case Nicolas Sarkozy will throw a hissy fit anyway simply because he can. President Obama, for his part, acknowledged America's part for creating the fine mess the world is in and then followed up by telling the world that America can't be the world's sole shopper anymore. But Obama had other fish to fry for Lent. He was also busy making nice with Vladmir Putin's netting doll Russian President Dmitry Medvedev. The two issued a joint statement that they'll soon start talking about reducing their nuclear arsenals. You remember those right? In the meantime, populist rage over many forgotten topics exploded on the streets of London as protesters went several rounds with police. Which topics? Take your pick as it didn't matter overmuch. And this is just the beginning.